- Brianna and Erik's visit
- Odiorne Point trip with Ronnie and family
- Cameron's birthday
- Alissa's graduation
- ICT
- day at the Bay
- Impact Clubs
But now I need to record something more personal; something that God has been working on in my own life.
I recently heard this phrase, "not head knowledge, but life abandonment."
I have lots of head knowledge. I don't remember the first time I heard about Jesus. I'm sure I heard about Him before I understood words. I do remember the time I gave my life to Him though- that was 39 years ago. And since then I have devoted my life to getting to know Him more and to live a life that is pleasing to Him.
But it hasn't always (or even mostly) been easy! And there have been times that doubt has crept in. The Enemy trying to sway me, telling me it's too hard, it's not real, it's not worth it. No one knows how many times I felt like giving in.
Over the last few months God has been planting seeds in my heart that would grow to be the strongest desire I've ever had to hold on to Him for dear life.
It began with us as a HFK staff deciding to write a missionary story and put it in flashcard form to tell to the city kids as part of our summer ministry. Jeremiah found the story of Awoyo. Our theme was going to be Fearless and this seemed to fit right in. Jeb was actually put in contact with the missionaries that went to that tribe and we discovered that it was Indonesia and the tribe was the Moi people. We had a lot of contact through email with the Crocketts who were the ones that first went to the Moi. Turns out that only 20 years ago no one in the world knew the Moi existed and the Moi didn't know anything at all about the outside world. We learned that Stephen Crockett, in an act of faith and obedience to God (life abandonment) jumped out of a helicopter onto the land of this newly discovered tribe, with the desire to befriend them, learn their language, share the Gospel with them, and translate the Bible into their language. Stephen and Carolyn brought their family there and for the last 17 years have been faithful in sharing Jesus with the Moi. The Moi have turned to God and are now enjoying much of the Bible in their own language! But the sacrifice on the part of the Crocketts is incredible. No running water or electricity. No access to doctors or grocery stores or internet or familiarities. No cozy white Christmases, Thanksgiving turkeys, or Fourth of July fireworks. Serious injuries, malaria, and more. They sacrificed for the One who sacrificed His own life for them.
The next thing happened at church. I saw a new family in the children's wing and when I went to introduce myself discovered that they were a missionary family home on furlough- our church was their sending church. They are missionaries to Indonesia! They have 2 kids Leah and Micah's age and it was our privilege to have them over for a meal and talk with them. They are sacrificing. A lot. For what? For Jesus- because they know that Jesus loves the tribe they are serving and He wants them to know Him personally. They know they are His body- His hands, feet, and voice.
Fast forward to ICT. During a class I was teaching, I shared with the group the story about a girl, Dorie, who many years ago was abandoned by her mother, lived in an orphanage (where she heard about God's love for her!), and then in many abusive foster homes. It had been a while since I read her story, so after one of our group asked me more about her, I looked her up. As an adult, she was a missionary to Indonesia! In reading more about Dorie, I discovered the name of woman whose speaking at a church allowed Dorie to meet this woman's parents and become "adopted" by them. I was intrigued by this woman and found her name to be Darlene Rose and learned she had written a book. I requested it from my library and was amazed to see that Darlene had been a missionary to Indonesia!
So now, I was on to my 4th "random" Indonesia mention. I read the book by Darlene Rose in one day. And it was on reading it that God really pulled everything together for me and got me to the point where I am now. Darlene and her new husband went to Indonesia as missionaries. Not long after they were there, World War II began and the Japanese invaded the Dutch Indies (what Indonesia used to be called). They took both Darlene and her husband to separate camps as prisoners of war. Darlene shares what happened to her while she was imprisoned and it includes hunger, sickness, torture, and even the news that her husband died. Why was this book so encouraging to me? Because Darlene was sustained by her relationship with God and the Scriptures she had memorized. The details are incredible. God's presence. HE was enough. At one point in her imprisonment she was in a cell all alone. She was taken out periodically and beaten, she was sick with dysentery, cerebral malaria, and beriberi, she had only a jagged tin can to use as a toilet. This is what she says, I knew that they could not lock my Lord out of that cell, even when they locked me in. I don’t know if you’ll understand it, but that little cell became a sanctuary to me because my God was there with me.
Along with other powerful words of testimony, Darlene shares how she was never alone and having her God with her was what allowed her to be a leader among the women prisoners, to find favor with the notoriously cruel commander, and to have peace throughout the most horrific of circumstances.
So, two things.
-Sacrifice
-God's presence
After studying, reading, hearing about the lives of these faithful missionaries, I realized I don't even know sacrifice. So I "sacrifice" time to reach inner city kids who don't know Jesus. I "sacrifice" some material things- as money is scarce in our line of work. But the common denominator in the stories of these missionaries is that they truly believe that their sacrifice (which I think is HUGE) is nothing compared to what Jesus sacrificed for them. And sharing Jesus with people who need Him is the greatest cause and worth any sacrifice.
And through the sacrifices, it is God's presence that sustains, strengthens, validates, and gives peace.
I don't want to be a baby when things don't go my way. I don't want to feel sorry for myself when I don't get things that I want. I don't want to think I am a martyr for giving up "so much". I want to memorize more scripture, sacrifice more, spend more time with God and hold on to Him for dear life.
I want life abandonment, not head knowledge.
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